A Cause in a Cup

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Wendy’s. All opinions are 100% mine.

Adoption is the heartbeat of much of this blog. Once you open up your life and home to someone born to another person, it changes the way you view the world. Everything you encounter fits through that new lens and my blog and social media did the same when our adopted sons, Andrew and Simon entered our family nearly three years ago. A lot of what I post around the internet focuses on social justice issues and today's post also highlights that very topic.

Wendy’s is known for their delicious JR. bacon cheeseburgers and Frosty, but there is a far greater reputation they have because of their founder Dave Thomas. In 1992 Mr. Thomas created a foundation that had a very personal connection called the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption. Being an adopted child himself, he understood the importance a forever family has on a child's life and set out to help other kids who were just like him. Through his foundation Mr. Thomas has served more than 11,500 children and has helped more than 4,500 children be adopted. With the ongoing support and collaboration of Wendy’s adoption page, the foundation works to find permanent, loving homes for the 130,000+ children who are currently waiting in North America’s foster care system.

I really had no idea that such a great organization existed in one of my favorite burger joints! Recently I went through the drive-thru at Wendy's on my way to a performance and noticed that they had a new design on their cups. Children's illustrations adorn the cold and specialty beverage cups and there is an amazing story behind each design. I received Richard's cup the last time I ate at Wendy's and he shared his "family first" moment at the zoo. Since we are annual zoo pass holders, I immediately connected with this 9 year old's experience.

The four illustrations featured on the Wendy's cups now through November were drawn by children who have been adopted through Wendy’s Wonderful Kids, a collaboration between Wendy's and the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption that focus on the kids that have been waiting the longest for a family. Each story appears to be an ordinary moment in any family, but the moving animated films utilizing the kid's drawings and personal stories shed light on the importance a family plays in the life of a waiting child. Each only a minute long, it's quick to see the great impact Wendy's Wonderful Kids Program had on these four children plus 4,500 others who have been stuck in foster care for far too long. All four videos can be seen here.

Foster care has always been something my husband and I have been drawn towards. I sat and watched each video with a tissue in hand because I knew I would cry. Something as simple as a mom, dad, grandparents, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles and cousins can change the trajectory of a person's life for the better. And all it takes is one family saying yes to one kid and this miracle takes place. I'm getting teary-eyed even typing these words because I know first hand that Andrew and Simon will be forever changed because they are a part of my family and I'm forever changed because I'm a part of theirs.

What makes Wendy's Wonderful Kids Program unique is the 206 recruiters that are hired specifically to take on a caseload of children that the system has forgot, partnering with these children to give them the attention they deserve and working aggressively to find these children their forever families. Children like Rigo, Angel, Olivia and Richard need an advocate to come alongside of them and make sure that their best interest is what is being pursued with vigor and tenacity. Because of Wendy's and the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, kids in the foster care system are receiving this type of care and consideration.

Dear friends of mine have fostered and adopted through the foster care system here in the United Sates and it has been spectacular to witness the growth that happens when a child has the permanence of a loving, supportive family. Adoption is a wonderful thing to consider and Wendy's has free resources and an adoption guide for those interested in learning more information. Maybe adoption isn't something your family can consider at this time but you would like to help; the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption website has lots of information about practical ways you can get involved.

Another way you can help is to share this blog post with your friends and family on social media to continue to spread the word about foster care adoption for the 130,000 other children who are still in the foster care system. And the final way is to make a financial contribution directly to the foundation.

Thanks for taking the time to learn more about Wendy's Wonderful Kids Program and the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and don't forget to share your favorite family moments or adoption stories in the comments below. Take a spin through the drive-thru at Wendy's today, grab one of these fantastic cups and remember what Dave Thomas said,

“THESE CHILDREN ARE NOT SOMEONE ELSE’S RESPONSIBILITY. THEY ARE OUR RESPONSIBILITY.”

Time stood still {2 year adoption anniversary}

When we decided to adopt we didn't realize that time would stand still for two full years. The rest of the world continued to spin, but we didn't move a day. Every day was the same. The stress was immeasurable. Craig and I reeled and clung to one another as we ran the daily race of parenting and living. And it all blurred together into this timeless vortex that was our lives.

Lots of people told us it would be hard and we completely believed them. But when you are walking it day in and day out you can't remember what anyone said or didn't say or suggested or I-told-you-so-ed. You were just surviving. We cocooned ourselves (like our adoption classes and adoption agency told us to) to give the boys a stable, simple life the first six months and this isolation only added to the strange space-time-continuim we felt. As the first year home rolled into the second year home, we didn't see an end in sight, which made it even harder.

The boys were making progress in attachment and reaching developmental milestones, but Craig and I couldn't see the trees for the forest. We walked on, drinking coffee, consuming unhealthy amounts of junk food, and binge watching Netflix after the kids were asleep. To call our life "living" would be inaccurate. One foot in front of the other was the mantra.

Then we hit the two year mark of adding Andrew and Simon to our family and something changed. I was working during the holiday season, we were joyfully adding new holiday traditions and the Barber family was thriving. We began to feel a sense of rest, as if the adoption vacuum that had sucked us up in January 2012 had finally decided to spit us out again. And for the first time in three years, Craig and I could breathe again.

And what do you do when you breathe again? You dream. 

This new year holds the promise of so much for us. Our lives are beginning again as a complete and functional family of six. There is anticipation in the air and the joy permeating our house is infectious. The two years of working diligently day after day seems to be ending and our hard work is showing it's fruit. And it is sweet.

Andrew and Simon show affection to us and their siblings. They express emotion, communicate their desires and share many jokes. Their appetites are healthy and their imagination is vivid. And boy, can they climb, jump and run! They embody everything a healthy three year old should be and we are so thrilled! What parent would ask for more?

We all still have our days of troubles and tantrums and turmoil, but it is less frequent and more easily tended to. This is what I envisioned when we adopted. These sweet moments and long hours of parenting come to fruition. Two years later and life is starting to feel normal.


In November 2012 we flew around the world and made two strangers our sons. 
The oddness and wonder is not lost on me. 
Love (and years of hard work) builds a family.


p.s. Read our 1 year adoption anniversary using YouTube videos or our Gotcha Day post.

I Googled my sons and found them // ADOPTION UNKNOWNS

Part of adopting internationally is the not knowing.

You receive half filled out papers and numerous stories that kind-of match up about your child's history and you take those and go along your merry way, resigning yourself that you won't ever fully know what took place in your child's life before you entered. 
That is just how it is.

I've done Google image searches on my sons twice since we brought them home from Uganda and have actually found them. Do you have any idea how exciting, surreal and violating that is at the same time? Images of your child at a younger age is such a wonderful glimpse into the beautiful person you have come to love. It is a precious gift. At the same time, it is so very strange to see them in the arms of someone whose name you don't know in a location you don't recognize. 

But the most violating part is seeing your son half naked, private parts fully shown in an article about abandoned children in Africa. While it is true, it feels like exploitation to see someone who is no longer abandoned, who has a home and family used to make a statement. Your son has become the poster child for African poverty.

I am still sorting out all of the emotions that have accompanied these latest images discovered, but I wanted to share one of the strange sides of international adoption that are rarely talked about. This is not for the faint of heart. The not knowing can drive you mad as you circle around the possibilities, the unknowns, the what ifs. It is enough to drive someone crazy because you love this child. They are yours and you would and do fight for them on a daily basis. 

It is heart breaking and hard to see images of your child before they had an advocate, an ally, a family. Those images are the truth about poverty, third world countries, and a messed up planet, but they are still of YOUR son, not just another example.

p.s. Gotcha Day was  a pretty awesome day and we are getting ready to celebrate 2 years of Andrew and Simon being home.

I can't. I have kids.

Life is about seasons.

Right now I'm in the interrupted-a-million-times-during-any-one-activity phase of life. It can be down right infuriating to try sitting down to write this blog post, for instance and before I can even type out a sentence I've had one kid ask to paint, another if I can help them in the bathroom and even my husband needing my help because he ran out of gas in the lawn mower. I'm ok with helping them and that is what I do, but sometimes you just want to do something start to finish without hitting the pause button.

On days like today, I have to remind myself that this season will pass. One day I won't be helping little ones with every small task and I will be able to finish a blog post without needing to make lunch and fetch drinks in the middle of it. That is a refreshing thought during this time of half formed thoughts and every conversation interjected with, "Don't do that!" to one of my many little people.

In the spring I held a book club for "Almost Amish" by Nancy Sleeth to any one who wanted to delve into the world of simplicity. At the end of the book she talks about different seasons in life. So many times we Americans think we need to have it all at the same time: successful careers, a wonderful marriage, competent children, admirable charitable work. The truth is, it can't be done. Something will suffer or our Instagram feed will only show half truths of our put-together lives. The Amish realize that not every season is the harvest. Sometimes the earth is hard, cold or even frozen making it impossible to plant. And during that time, you stay inside and let the ground be dormant. Seasons should be observed, but often they are ignored in our fast paced lives.

Since adopting, we have put a lot of our life on hold to make sure that Andrew and Simon have what they need from us. In many ways, they are doing great, but we can still see and will probably continue to see, the scars of not having parents during those critical months of development. This season of life requires a lot of work and energy during all parts of the day. (My mom shared a great article about how parenting adopted kids is different. Check it out.) And Craig and I are ok with that. We signed up for this when we decided to adopt, realizing the hard work that lay ahead.

And all of our kids need us. From homeschooling to learning piano to bike riding to table manners, they all are growing, changing, learning and by choosing to be parents we decided to make our lives about helping them become the people they are suppose to be. Life contains a lot of, "I can't. That is during nap time." Or "I can't. I'll have the kids with me." Or "Sorry. That would be too much for the kids." That is the season of life we are in.

Understanding where I am in life and wanting a little freedom can still co-exist in my little world. I'm human and sometimes just want what I want and the world to leave me be for a couple of hours. Case and point: acting professionally, my life aspiration, is on hold. This is not the season for it. But I know that one day, the ground will be ready to harvest, the kids will be grown and I'll pursue my dreams. But for now, I'm busy planting into four lives and being the best wife and parent I can be.

For now, just call me Mrs. Farmer.

1 Year Anniversary of our Adoption {using YouTube videos}

Well, it's been a year since this happened. And one year ago today we landed in America after almost five weeks in Uganda (time WILL be dedicated to blogging that because I had two photographer capture our airport homecomming and they need to be shared!). Andrew and Simon have been apart of our family since last November and it has been the craziest, hardest, most challenging year of my life. Every day is a struggle and I am not being dramatic about that statement. You know me. I save my drama for the stage (by the way, I am actually rehearsing my first show in a year RIGHT NOW! And you can buy tickets for the show December 5-22nd here.). So when I say every day is a struggle for me, I mean that honestly. And just now, in the last couple of weeks I am starting to see the light at the end of this LONG tunnel.

Not only has the adoption been challenging, but we have faced a lot of crisis in our immediate and extended family, including the death of a parent. Craig would describe this past year as treading water with no land in sight. To say it has been hard would be saying it nicely. This last year has been a kick to the gut. Have there been good times? Of course! Do we love Andrew and Simon? Absolutely! But adopting two kids at once with 4 kids under 5 is the craziest endeavor we have undertook and it has come at a cost.

For a couple of weeks now I have been thinking about what I wanted to write to capture how I felt and what I have learned this past year like other adoptive mom bloggers. "Eloquent" and "moving" were the words that came to mind about how I wanted to communicate all we have been through as a family since last November. I wanted to warn share with other people on this journey to brace prepare themselves for a truly tough and sacrificial existence. And I hoped the whole blog post would be charming and engaging as I regaled stories of triumph and heart break, making all of you laugh and tear-up as you read the things I haven't blogged about all year.


But then I remembered that I still have 4 kids 5 and under and that life is still super crazy! They haven't graduated from high school or even entered kindergarten yet, so I don't have more than 15 minutes to myself on any given day to write a blog post. Whose life did I think I had as I dreamed about my 1 year post anyway? 

Bahahaha! I crack myself up.


So, instead, I decided to share what my life has been like this past year through YouTube videos. I'll let the work and free time of other people benefit my blogging. And if you can't tell, my sarcasm and cutting humor has only amplified since last year. Overall, I've kept quiet about the happenings in our family since we adopted. Now, it is time to share just a glimpse.

Grab a cup of coffee, read my captions and watch each video. Enjoy!



1. I like adoption. When my heart gets faint, I watch this video and read books and blogs from amazing adoptive families like this one. They inspire me to keep on going, day after day after day.




2. #$%@ People say to Transracial Families. Honestly, people have said these things to me. Not kidding! Every time I watch this video, I die laughing because this IS my life now.




3. What if adults had tantrums like toddlers?  Every single day I want to do this. Every. Single. Day. The number of tantrums in my house are innumerable and sometimes I want to join in the fun.





4. People with no kids don't know. To all my friends without kids, this video is for you. Because, "YOU HAVE NO IDEA!" In love, of course, but his sarcasm is the inner monologue in my snarky head on rough days.




5. The story of Ian and Larissa. In the midst of the chaos, sometimes I need to pause. There are many people whose stories I don't know and could never understand. Stepping outside of myself helps to put in perspective how blessed I am.





6. I'm not crying. We have had a lot of hurt, heartaches and days of crying. Instead of wallowing in our sadness, we find funny things to lift our spirits. "These aren't tears of sadness... I'm cutting onions."





7. Make the bed. Ordinary, simple chores become huge ordeals with kids. This video shows the absurd conversations that take place in our house. Love them all!





8. Mighty. I have to remind myself that what I am doing is worth it. That I am a barrier from the storm for my four precious children. That this life on hold place that I am in has value beyond what I can see.




And there you have it. Maybe in another year I will actually find a little more time to write my own thoughts, but for now, thanks for tuning in!

The scary part of adoption is...

... the not knowing.

When you adopt, especially from another country, there are a lot of unknowns. I knew that I would have a hard time with some of those mysteries: the accuracy of birth dates,  who their parents where, why they weren't with them now, etc. But I really wasn't prepared for the unknowns that hit our family this week.

On Tuesday morning, Andrew woke up from a nap, disoriented and unable to use the entire left side of his body. It continued to get worse, causing our poor little guy to become extremely scared and agitated with his failing body. That morning Andrew was himself and after the nap, he wasn't. I had no idea what had happened, all I knew was that we needed to get to the hospital immediately. Unable to get a hold of anyone, I loaded all four kids into the car and drove praying and crying to the ER. The left side of Andrew's face started to droop as if he had had a stroke and it appeared that he couldn't see anything. My heart was crying out to God and my lips were uttering whispers to my savior that He had never failed me before and I knew He would be with me, whatever happened to Andrew.

At the ER, we were rushed back to start monitoring, drawing blood, getting urine samples and trying to figure out what was happening. My brother came to take Asher and Alethea, Craig was there to help with Simon, and my friend Jenn was there to help in anyway she could. Mom and Dad started to drive down from Georgia, knowing that things were not getting better. For five hours, Andrew was not able to move his hand or foot on the left side of his body. His face was still drooping on the left side, and his tears, agitation and anger did not stop. That ER room held our fears, anxiety and questions for seven hours as we waited for answers.

It is hard to watch your two year old be catheterized, have an IV put in, go through a CAT scan, and have a spinal tap done. All within a three hour span. And he has only been a part of our lives for seven months, which makes it even more heartbreaking. Andrew didn't have the comfort of knowing we would always be there for him, having his best interest, like Asher and Alethea do. I can't imagine all of the uncertainty that filled his heart as he was poked, prodded and unable to move.

One thing it did show us is that Andrew is a fighter. He was heavily sedated so that he could have the CAT scan and spinal tap done. Instead of sleeping, our little guy was talking, trying to pull himself off of the bed, and attempting to move around as if nothing was wrong. Our nurse said, "If I had that much sedation, I would be snowed." Not Andrew. He was determined to fight and keep on going, no matter what. Andrew's fighting under sedation reminded me of all the fighting he has had to do his entire life. From the moment he was born, he has fought. Fought to stay alive, fought to be noticed, fought to be fed, fought to be loved. And in our family, he fights for security, attachment and for the desire to belong, no matter what he does. I can't wait to see how God uses that spirit for His good in the future. But for now, I am so very grateful Andrew fought to stay alert in that bed as we searched for answers.

Unable to do anything more for Andrew, they transferred him to a children's hospital that had a pediatric neurosurgeon on staff. Andrew and I loaded into the ambulance, ready to spend the night at a new location, which hopefully could help him. Once we arrived, the questions began. And I had no answers.

"Does Andrew have a family history of epilepsy?"

I don't know.

"Is there a family history of blood clotting?"

I don't know.

"Does anyone in Andrew's family suffer from strokes?"

I don't know.

I don't know, I don't know, I DON'T KNOW!

I had no answers for the doctors. And it killed me. I wanted to be able to help my son, to tell them about his parent's medical history, but I couldn't. I could only answer, "To the best of knowledge, no."

Andrew under went 12 hours of EEG monitoring, an hour long MRI where he was completely under, EKG screening, more blood tests and a sonogram of his heart. We received the results back from some, but not all of the tests. Everything kept coming back as negative, which was good, but left us with very little reassurance that we would leave the hospital with the knowledge of what caused his episode.

On Thursday night, they released Andrew from the hospital. We knew a little bit more than when we first went in, but not much. He is better, happy to be home, and has regained his mobility completely. We are grateful for the amazing care at the children's hospital, my family who dropped everything to be there for all six of us and for my friends who have prayed and loved on us over the past couple of days. But my heart is still anxious and questioning the unknown.

Through it all, I have seen how God has made me strong for that moment and for the past couple of days. This kind of event could have driven Craig and I apart, but instead it has brought us together. My attachment to Andrew has grown leaps and bounds. There is no question in my mind: Andrew is my son. Andrew is more attached to Craig, myself and even my parents, as they spent hours with us in the hospital. I can see the positive and my faith is strengthened because of it.

Now, we wait. Wait for the results, wait for him to have a seizure if that is what caused it, wait for it to never happen again. We wait, because we don't know. And a part of that not knowing scares me, but mostly it forces me to trust that God loves Andrew more than I ever will. My faith meets the real life situation of the mystery and I am going to choose to let my faith lead me into whatever happens next. Even if the future is scary.

Being a tourist in Uganda {Source of the Nile}

While adopting from Uganda, we visited the source of Nile! It was truly beautiful and relaxing to be on a boat on the Nile River and Lake Victoria. This was a much needed break from the busy, noisy, dirty city where we were living for almost five weeks. No matter where I am, I always feel more calm and connected to God in His creation, and our trip to Africa was no exception.

At the Nile, ready to board the boat.

Our boat.

We paid for a guided boat tour with our friend Lori and her family and it was great to be experiencing Uganda with another adoptive family. It can feel isolating to be in a foreign country trying to bound with your new children and trying to take in as much of the culture as possible at the same time. That time felt like a tunnel of crazy and I am really excited to actually go back again to truly visit Uganda.

Lori with Emmy, her grandmother and mom and our family on the boat

I guess I should have paid more attention to the history behind why this is the source of the Nile during our tour and all that jazz, but it turns out that Simon HATES being on boats. He screamed the whole time, which made it impossible to hear the presentation our guide was making. Bummer. Next time...

Our guide.

That cement block behind us is suppose to be a monument to John Speke, who found the source.

Being touristy and I have no idea why I am posing like that.

With any good tourist destination, you have vendors selling stuff. The Nile is no exception.

And do you see that swirl in the center of the picture? That is the source of the Nile, or so John Speke thought.

Even in Uganda, school children take field trips.

After the boat ride, we ate some Uganda touristy food, Craig changed a horrible diaper behind some bushes and then saw real, live, wild monkeys!!! This was a dream come true for me as I've always wanted a pet monkey. 

Monkeys on the side of the road.

When all of the monkeys ran away, we headed to the city of Jinja, where the source of the Nile is found. In the city, we ran into some missionaries we met at our guest house and Katie Davis! Just kidding. But we did find her office near the most disgusting bathrooms (including this one) that I experienced in Uganda. The irony of it all was on the back of the door of the bathrooms it talked about being grateful for this toilet and asked for donations to make more bathrooms like it in Jinja. I couldn't help but laugh and laugh, as the sign clearly was not abreast to the state of the toilet at that moment.

The office of Katie Davis' ministry.

We did stop at the FIRST place in Uganda that had internet and the first internet cafe for a much needed "American" style cup o' joe and chocolate chip cookie. And we learned that the turn "boda-boda" which refers to a motorcycle taxi actually originated in Jinja. People would ask bicycle taxi drivers to take them to the border of Uganda and Kenya and would shout, "Boda, boda!" Or in American English, "Border, border." Somehow the name transferred to motorcycle taxis and the name stuck!

Our Ugandan "Starbucks."

Craig and a french press. He's in love.

We were told that this trip would be lack-luster, but we enjoyed this great diversion from the waiting of the adoption process.

Being a toursit in Uganda {Tombs of Buganda Kings}

In the midst of waiting for court rulings, passports and US visas, we had time to kill. So, why not explore Andrew and Simon's homeland, tourist style? Our driver has been driving Americans for years and knew all of the great tourist destinations and restaurants. It was fun to see things from that side and it took our mind off of the waiting, but it didn't give us a true taste of Africa. The next time we go, we want to be taken around to see a more traditional side of Uganda, but for our transition to parenting two babies, we were grateful for the tourism.

One of the places we visited were the tombs of the kings in Buganda. We honestly didn't know much about the kingdom of Buganda and even though our boys are not from the kingdom so this wasn't their heritage, it was neat to learn something new. And of course, being the book-lovers that we are, I purchased a book all about it at the "gift shop" for future reading and reference.

I would love to say that I remembered what all of these pictures meant, but we had only been in country a day or two, so I was pretty out of it. And the book I bought is buried somewhere and remains to be seen since we returned several months ago. Oh well!

: Andrew fell fast asleep just as we arrived

: Traditional Bugandan paintings

: Paintings of the kings buried there

: Inside

: Burial plot of king's family

Now that we have settled into our new life as a family of six, it is nice to reflect back on the good times we had while in Uganda. I look forward to blogging more of our time in country and the stories we have about those four weeks. It truly is a beautiful nation and we are blessed to have two little pieces of it in our home.

Once upon a time, there was a pack of baby wipes...

As a crunchy, organic, "green" kind of mom, I do not use wipes that often. Sure, I use them to change diapers, but that is about it. I do not fear germs, so sometimes a little brushing of the hands is all I require. Other times, we head to the bathroom and used ol' fashion soap and water with a little elbow grease. I thought it was extremely wasteful to use baby wipes before every meal, or after playing at the playground or because their hands got a little messy at a meal. Besides the fact that then your hands/face had a residue on them that messed up your next meal. Who wants to be eating baby wipes?

That all changed when I added two more children to my brood in one day! Four kids has made me a baby wipe-aholic. I am now a believer in the beauty of these disposable solutions. Wipes have become my best friend. Seriously, people. I can not go ANYWHERE without a LARGE quantity of wipes within arm's reach. The world would end if they were left at home. Let me give you a couple of examples.

Andrew's first experience with chopsticks.

{EXAMPLE #1}

At lunch one day, I had served everyone an age appropriate portion of refried beans and brown rice. For my oldest two, I place it in front of them and encouraged them to eat. For the younger ones, I placed it on the table, instead of on their high chair trays and went to use the bathroom. When I came back, Big had grabbed his bowl off of the table and had attempted to feed himself with his fist. There were refried beans and rice everywhere! I started to get frustrated and then I remembered that I was now a wipes mom. There was no need to fret because I could simply grab a wipe, clean up my child and discard the mess. What a novelty!

{EXAMPLE #2}

Shortly after we returned from Uganda, all four of the kids had snotty noses. There was snot everywhere! I was grabbing tissues left and right and constantly cleaning up liquid-cold from their upper lips, cheeks and even hair. It was exhausted to be on high alert for the viscous discharge that was streaming out of all eight nostrils of my clan. Little woke up from a nap looking white. I am not exaggerating. His beautiful dark complexion had been replaced with dried mucus from forehead to chin and ear to ear. Little's big brown eyes stared at me from under his white mask as if to say, "Why does my face feel so funny?" Tissues were going to do no good for this job, so I headed to the nearest pack of wipes (I have them on the side bar, on the book shelf, on the kitchen counter, in each bathroom and in every bedroom) and started to clean the poor kid up.

Playing in our home-away-from-home in Uganda.

{EXAMPLE #3}

(The best/worst for last, which involved a bathroom incident, in case you want to skip it)

We were playing at our local children's museum and I smelled something funny. I thought to myself, "Man! If that is me, I REALLY need to shower." The kids played the morning away and as the day went on, I would sling one of my little guys onto my back and into the Ergo. When Little was on, I would think, "Maybe I was imagining that smell..." When Big was on I would think, "I am so stinky! Wait a minute. Oh, no. He's pooped." And that should have been my clue that I needed to get my pack of baby wipes and head to the nearest changing station. But they were in the car. I had broken my new rule as a mother of four: never be out of arm's reach of a pack of baby wipes. So, I let the stink ride until the other three were safely buckled in the car and I proceeded to take Big off of my back. And that was when I realized that wipes weren't going to handle it. Big's stink had soaked through his diaper, through his shorts and through MY shirt. To say I was appalled would be an understatement. But what is a mother to do in that kind of situation? I grabbed that glorious pack of unscented Target brand baby wipes, cleaned my son and then attempted to clean my back from the nastiness that had been left there. There was still some residual smell, but I knew that those moist cloth segments had saved the back of my driver's side seat from a horrible fate.



If these three incidents, as well as the parasite-diapers dripping down the leg and the eating of handfuls of dirt didn't make me a wipes believer, I would never be converted! Being a mother of four has truly changed a lot about me, but the think I am most grateful it has changed is my freedom to wipe and throw away. Whoever invented that little tote-able pack has my undying admiration.

Parenting a 4, 3, 2 and 1 year old

Life has been a little crazy and overwhelming with Christmas, family in town and adjusting to our family of six. We are adjusting well, but at the same time, we are freaking out! I'm told that this is completely normal of parents of more then two kids, biological or adopted. Trying to get a handle on the daily grind and the huge amount of laundry, diapers, dishes and mess that my kiddos create is a full time job! And that doesn't include homeschooling (which has been on break since we returned from Uganda), investing in each kid, showering, getting dressed for the day or spending time with my husband. We have adjusted a LOT of things to manage four kids, but there is more to do.

I wish I had something profound to write to you all about, but we are still trying to figure everything out here. It is just as hard as I thought and at the same time, it is easier then I imagined. That sounds crazy, I am sure, but it is different then I thought it would be. It is really hard to get everyone dressed, and fed, and to sit still for a photograph! In other ways, I find it easier to take all four kids out into the backyard then just two. They keep each other occupied better, which allows me to work on bonding with one of the kids at a time. Maybe once I get a little more sleep (hahaha!) I'll write something that has more thought and coherency. For now, enjoy these images of my new life parenting a 4, 3, 2 and 1 year old.

smiles with Andrew :: baby wearing two :: djembe time with Craig

scared of the doll :: brother trampoline time :: playing hide-n-go-seek
the do and the wish-I-could-do :: helping with laundry :: first date night in 2 months